I hate my life. Yesterday I liked it just fine; today I hate it.

Why? Let me count the ways... As of a few weeks ago, I realized teaching wasn't the profession for me. That's a good thing. What isn't good is that it leaves me professionless, again. Right now I'm in a low-paying, dead-end job that I don't really like. The economy sucks, my skill level is worthless, and I payed a small fortune to get a worthless bachelor's degree. (okay, it wasn't really a fortune, but it sounds more pathetic that way).

What a piece of crap. Why didn't I listen to my mom, who told me a liberal arts degree was useless? I ignored her, thinking I was sooo artsy and above the idea of making money. Ha! Now I have no skills and absolutely no interest in working at all. My current job doesn't even pay me enough for me to be able to afford to purchase an automobile. Which I need to do.

I don't know why I ever thought I was 'intelligent' or something like that. What was I thinking? Whoa am I dumb. I have no organizational skills, no problem-solving skills, no creative skills, nada. What the heck am I good for? And desk jobs are smothering me. Maybe I'll go on a hunger strike. "Don't make me work but give me money anyway, or I'll starve myself. I mean it."

Do you need to remind me that other people have worse problems, that mine are just a drop in some people's buckets? No, you don't. I already realize that, and it makes me feel all the more despicable. Thanks for reminding me though.

Could this have something to do with the fact that I've forgotten to take my meds for a week? Maybe. But even if I did have synthetic happiness, I still would not be able to ignore the fact that my life sucks and I'm on the road to nowhere. What is my point in this life? Why don't I have any talents, or at least why don't I have any talents I could use to earn money with?

I guess the high I was on from the U2 concert had to end sometime, but boy, what a terrific crash!

 

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